This year, in a way I’ve never felt before, I find myself pondering what I want this Holiday season.
I’m deeply aware of the void within me. The dining room table that feels smaller with the reality that fewer seats will be filled.
What is it that I am looking for? A hallmark Christmas? Snow blanketing the mountains? The perfect gifts wrapped under the tree?
While all of those things sound magical, that’s not it. I want more. I NEED more.
I need Jesus.
Many who know Him celebrate Advent this month. For me, my past experiences of Advent have been coated in an uninviting religious spirit.
A spirit that feels more like a joyless teacher giving me homework or forcing me to fake godliness through assigned readings and telling me to feel meek.
I could feel my body physically become defensive, not wanting to enter into what felt so unkind and unloving.
The result was the closing off of my heart to any engagement or interaction with the Advent season.
But this year, something in me is desiring to risk being curious.
What does an inviting Advent season look like? Feel like? Smell like? Taste like?
I want to remove the religious spirit of Advent and uncover the beauty, power and humanity of who Jesus is and what His birth represents to this world.
I want to choose joyful anticipation for the arrival of The King. Darkness to light. Breathing in the truth of what His life offers . . . .
“We are invited to make a pilgrimage into the heart and life of God.”Dallas Willard, The Divine Conspiracy